11 Conversations Every Couple Needs to Have
Most couples who come to see me aren’t struggling because they don’t love each other.
They’re struggling because there are conversations they’ve never had — about money, about conflict, about what they each actually need, about the future they’re each imagining. Not because they were avoiding them deliberately. Just because nobody ever told them these conversations needed to happen, and life got busy, and it was easier to assume they were on the same page.
The conversations that matter most
Research consistently shows that certain conversations predict relationship health and longevity more than almost anything else. Not surface-level conversations — the real ones. The kind most couples either avoid entirely or stumble into sideways during an argument.
The topics that matter most include communication styles and how you each handle conflict, money and what it means to each of you, intimacy and connection, roles and expectations — who does what and whether those assumptions are actually shared, family of origin and what you’re each bringing from your history, values and beliefs, and the vision you each have for your shared future.
Most couples assume they’re on the same page about these things. The PREPARE/ENRICH research — gathered from over three million couples across thirty years — consistently shows that assumption is often wrong. Not in a catastrophic way. Just in the quiet, accumulating way that becomes distance over time.
A research-backed way to have them
The PREPARE/ENRICH Assessment + Debrief is built around exactly these conversations. Each partner completes the PREPARE/ENRICH relationship assessment independently online — it takes about 30 minutes — and the results generate a personalised report mapping your specific strengths and growth areas as a couple.
The debrief session then works through those results together in a structured, supportive way — giving you a concrete, research-based starting point for the conversations rather than just guessing at what’s worth talking about.
It’s available in person in Squamish and online across BC. The cost is $325 CAD for the 90-minute debrief session, which includes both assessments.
Who this is for
The assessment and debrief is for couples who are moving in together, getting engaged, recently married, or simply wanting to invest in their relationship before things get hard rather than after.
It’s also for couples who are generally doing well but sense there are conversations they’ve been circling around without quite having — and want a structured, research-based way to actually have them.
If your relationship is currently in crisis or you’re navigating significant conflict, couples counselling is probably a better starting point. But if things are generally solid and you want to build something intentional on top of that foundation — the assessment is exactly what it’s designed for.
Not sure if you’re ready?
The free couples relationship exercise is a good first step — a short, self-paced exercise that helps you and your partner identify where you’re aligned and where it might be worth a closer look. Many couples use it as a starting point before booking the full assessment.
A note on this as a gift
The PREPARE/ENRICH Assessment + Debrief also works beautifully as an engagement gift or wedding gift — something genuinely useful rather than another item for the registry. If you’d like to give it as a gift, get in touch directly at jill@communicatingwell.com and I can arrange it.
Ready to book or have questions about whether this is the right fit? Visit the PREPARE/ENRICH Assessment + Debrief page for full details, or reach out directly — I’m happy to have a quick conversation about it. I also offer premarital counselling in Squamish and online across BC for couples wanting more ongoing support.
